Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Fockball

I haven't written in many days. Not that I did not want to but you will all agree with how Satan lures people into procrastination. Having a lot of time on my hands is something I am not used to.. and surely not without a rotating fan on the ceiling. You would ask why? You would surely not be wrong in asking that because until a few days ago I did not realize the importance of that.

Lie on your bed and watch the fan rotate and you are drawn in like a hypnotizing effect and then your mind wanders uninhibited. Wonderland or Narnia.. it's up to you. But you get the feel right?

Now I had this wonderful way to kill whatever time I had alone in my room back in India. When the fan's on full speed, pick up a sock. Curl it into a ball. Lie down and try to hit the ceiling through the rotating fan. Bingo you have fockball [fan-sock-ball]. You can assign points for hit or miss.

So having given another exciting indoor sport for you people to pursue I will wander into one of the annoying habits patient people have.

People are stupid. I'm just documenting it [I don't exclude myself]. Ever called a toll free number [TFN] ? Now I know a very patient guy [PG]. He happens to call a lot of toll free numbers [seriously cud be his hobby!]. But anyways one such afternoon when I was taking a nap at his place, he calls up some toll-free number and puts the phone on speaker. As is usual there is a 2 minute discourse on the options available and as though by stroke of some lame luck he chooses the very last option.

TFN: Thank-you for calling. All our customer representatives are busy assisting other customers. Please hold on. Your call will be serviced in the order it was received.

TFN: ting-ding-tingaga-dingag [or some lame music]

After 5 minutes....

TFN: All our representatives are still busy. Please keep on holding. Thank you.

Another 5 minutes...

TFN: Did you know you can visit our website www.blah blah blah and refer to the FAQs section.

Another 5 minutes...

Voice: Hi this is Maria.. how may I help you?

PG: Hi. How are you doing?

Maria: I am doing good. Thank you. How are you doing sir?

PG: Good. Thank you for asking. You have a sweet voice.
Me thinks: come on get over with it.. u r not going on a date with her.

PG explains some dumb problem for his laptop.

Maria: Sir, I would have to refer you to our technical expert. Would you mind if I put you on hold.

PG: No, not at all.

TFN: ting-ding-tingaga-dingag [or some lame music]

After 5 minutes....

TFN: All our representatives are still busy. Please keep on holding. Thank you.

Another 5 minutes...

TFN: Did you know you can visit our website www.blah blah blah and refer to the FAQs section.

Another 5 minutes...

Now that is 30 minutes on the TFN.

Having been deprived of my sweet nap, I cut the phone and switched off his laptop while he looked at me dumbfounded. On a reboot, the laptop worked fine.

There did I realize all people have time to spend and indulge into their own fockballs.

Maria almost thought she had a date.