Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Guru Devo bhava...

Still remember one of those classes of "moral science" when I was in the 4th or 5th grade and the class was being explained how man and woman came to the world [read Adam and Eve]. Nurtured by science and encouraged to put everything under the magnifying glass of inquisitive questioning, one of us stood up to bell the cat.

student: If God created man and woman how do you explain evolution theory.
sister: What are you talking about?
student: The evolution theory by Charles Darwin that say humans evolved from apes.
sister: I would say I have never seen any monkeys becoming humans all my life...


student shows a lost-in-kumbh-mela look. Laughter in the class.
Angry looks from the sister. Hush hush....

Even today I think maybe Charles Darwin was wrong and my innocent "moral science" sister was correct. Irony is that they belonged to different times. Had Charles Darwin been present there, he would have jumped out of the window then and there without a second thought. At least my school would have been marked well in the world atlas then.

Take another one. This time a science class:

Teacher: Sun is in the centre and earth revolves around it. Sun is stationary.
Smart student: My dad says that everything moves in space and universe. Nothing is stationary.
Teacher: That is wrong.


Next day student brings a big book [of the league of "brief history of time"] with appropriate parts highlighted. Teacher looks at it while the classroom waits in suspense as in an Hitchcock thriller.

Teacher: Well, that is for big people. For smaller classes Sun is stationary.

Duh!!!!!!! So while I completed my primary school, the Sun remained stationary. Till date I do not know if I have become big enough to understand that everything in universe moves and revolves.

In one of our geography classes - on the marvels of science and how technology has apparently reduced distances - a mention of FAX.

Student: What is the full form of FAX?
Teacher: Fast automatic xerox [without batting an eyelid]

Guess the teacher in all his knowledge [or the lack thereof] was good in creativity.

It took a great effort from my Dad to change my conviction and faith from my teachers and that FAX means Fascimile Automatic Exchange.

Take a look at this one:

Scene History class:

An old teacher was reading out some chapter concerning comparisons of scientific advances in ancient India and not-so-ancient India. Digressing from the text in book [a proactive discussing teacher!]:

Teacher: So you know we had lot of technical advances even when Rishis were there
They wrote vedas understood astronomy and all.

Bored class.. students yawning.

Teacher: TVs are invented in this century in the western world and it is now that we know of live cricket. But think of Mahabaharata. Sanjay gave a live account of the war to Dhritarashtra. Surely they had some sort of TV invented then.

Had the class been not sleeping, half of it would have fainted.

My age does not permit me to remember everything. My senior years were spent more in comprehending the objectivity of the classes than understanding what was being taught. So I do not remember such education from that part of my life - not until I reached engineering.

In a physics or a mathematics class in my I year:

A new teacher hands out the answer sheets after correction:

Student: Maa'm... you have given me zero for this problem.
Teacher: Yes the answer is not correct.
Student: But that is because I made a calculation mistake in the last step. I think I should get some marks for the logic.
Teacher: Let me see.
checks out the problem.
Teacher: Laagic [logic] is correct but procedure is wrong.
Student: Excuse me, sorry?
Teacher: Yes ma.. laagic is correct, but procedure is wrong.
Student: You mean my steps are wrong.
Teacher: No ma, steps correct. Laagic is correct but procedure is wrong.


You know its better to sit down in such situations than to argue.

All those who still have a dominant child in them, go and watch "Charlie and the Chocolate factory" - you will probably enjoy it.

Coming up next - Harry Potter - 6.........

7 Comments:

At 1:47 PM, Blogger Sujith said...

:-)))) too good and a nice read!

 
At 10:48 PM, Blogger The elderly camel said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 11:15 PM, Blogger The elderly camel said...

really nice read Phani! The thought of the sun being stationary in primary school is quite hilarious.
Dont u spill any beans from the potter book mind you!!!

 
At 4:35 AM, Blogger Sindhuja Parthasarathy said...

ah,glorified innocence!

 
At 1:30 PM, Blogger Ms.V said...

Hola!

Thanks for stopping by mine..:)

Don't they teach us stuff in the lower classes to only show them proved wrong in our latter, apparently more mature years? But then we also had teachers who weren't aware of the fact that Delhi was declared a state. And we had endless 'debates' about it. These teachers are a constitution unto themselves!

Nice post! :) Keep 'em comin'! :D

 
At 9:01 AM, Blogger silverine said...

I once asked my Civics teacher why England has a queen and not a king since it is a monarchy. She went a tizzy trying to grapple that one. She took an instant hatred to me after that. Of course I knew the answer.:))

 
At 4:17 PM, Blogger scorpigle said...

[jithu]: Thanks for stopping by.

[the elderly camel]: no beans spilled ;).. waiting for more snaps from you.

[samudraa]: right you are .. ah how I long for those days again

[v]: This learning and unlearning has psyched me... lol.. hope to see more articles once you find time and are back.

[silverine]: ah! the naughty you.. surely can visualise the immense saddistic pleasure you would have got there... every child has similar days, I guess

[dhundte rehe jaoge]: Right you are and welcome.. visted your blog.. seems you are new? Welcome aboard.

 

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